


Staying Relevant to Harry's Journey; Year Two

by DilynAliceBlake



Series: Staying Relevant to the Journey [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-11-04 06:14:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17893052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DilynAliceBlake/pseuds/DilynAliceBlake
Summary: Harry Potter and Dealing With It When It's Actually A Problem (and Not Before)Year Two for Harry Potter brings a multitude of challenges that our hero know better than to let best him!  He will keep his grades up and get that last missing chocolate frog card if he has to write the company to do it!





	1. Going to School, One Way or Another

     "School," Harry says slowly and clearly to the bulbous eyed cross between a human and a hairless cat that is trying to ruin his life "is how I learn to live on my own and not die. If I do not learn how to live on my own and not die, and it is your fault, then you will have basically murdered me."

    The creature attempts to slam its head into jelly using Harry's sock drawer as a bludgeoning object.

     "If you are too loud and I don't get fed, then me starving will _also_ be your fault," Harry points out reasonably. The creature wails in distress, which is the exact opposite of the effect Harry was hoping for.

     "Shut up and go awaaaaay," he whines, logic at its limit.

     There is much repetition of his full name and begging for forgiveness. Dobby's ears flop wildly and he offers to provide Harry with food. Harry's hands twitch while he wonders if he could tie said ears into a bow.

     Eventually, harry just switches to ignoring it in the hopes that it will lose interest and go away like Dudley does sometimes. Later he can't get through the platform and tries to calculate how many bus changes getting to Scotland will take.

 

      _Dear Professor Snape,_ he writes, _The platform isn't working so I will probably be late to school. Please could you owl me a more precise location than 'Scotland' so that I might find my way to the castle once I get nearer._

      _Regards_.

 

     Harry doesn't say "best" or "kind" because being pointlessly falsely polite is a waste of his time. He doesn't sign it because if the professor doesn't recognize his handwriting then he can just compare the letter to essays from every student in the castle, and then maybe rethink assigning them all so much homework. Doing so should only take him a day at most, so by the time Harry gets to Scotland he ought to have an idea where to head.

     Three bus transfers and two trains later Speckles returns, followed on broom by an irate looking Professor Snape.

     "Did it not occur to you to wait on the platform-" he begins seethingly, and Harry interrupts with a snort.

     "Wait for what; my letter to be intercepted and to find myself murdered?"

     "How did you even get an Oyster card, Potter? Unless you've just been stowing away on all these trains."

     Harry squints up at his teacher, and determines that the man is serious. His estimation of Snape's cleverness drops a few points accordingly.

     "You do realize," he says slowly, in the manner one says obvious things, "that galleons are made of **_gold_** , right?"

     Severus Snape rubs his temples in despair. He has six more years of this to look forward to, and at the current rate of proceedings he'll have aged ten years by the end of it.

     "I don't need your sass, Potter, just grab my sleeve and hold tight."

     Harry does, and then throws up bile all over Snape's robes after being forcefully shoved through space in a way that should not be possible or legal either one.

     "This is Hogsmeade, and as close to Hogwarts as apparation can take us." As he says this he waves his wand, and his robes are once again pristine and vomitless.

      "Please refrain from doing that again. In fact, everything you have done today is not to be repeated."

     Snape then lists everything that he perceives Harry has done wrong, from using such a recognizable owl to traveling long distances alone to wearing clothes like that in public.

     He delivers Harry to the great hall with a dozen detentions, since last year effectively proved that Harry does not give a single hoot about house points.  


Harry counts arriving at Hogwarts at all as a win, and starts his year musing over what an idiot the new defense teacher is likely to be.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry meets Tom Riddle via magic diary, and negotiates a timeshare on possession of his body.

     Quidditch incidents aside, a few months later Harry finds himself in possession of a diary that talks back. He found it in a flooded bathroom, and it writes with annoyingly artful flourish.

      _How did you come by my diary?_

     Harry debates. He humms and hawes over the merits of responding to something sentient. A book that thinks for itself, after all, is a whole different creature than a waterproof book to take notes in. Still, no matter the details, it was free, and has the potential to be, at the very least, interesting.

     Boringbooks don't get thrown at ghosts and flushed down toilets.

      _Why should I tell you?_   he scribbles onto the blank page.

      _This isn't your diary_ bleeds into view decisively.

     A magic book is trying to guilt trip him. Next thing you know he'll be being mocked by a biro.  Well, Harry _found_ the book. It was one hundred percent abandoned, which means it cannot be classified as stolen. Which means it's **his**.

      _I have it_  he writes, pen strokes firm with smugness. _Possession is nine tenths of the law._  Harry then draws a face with the tongue sticking out, because he's twelve and muggle raised, and that's a witty comeback.

      _What if I possessed **you**_   the diary threatens.  It reminds Harry of the storybooks that only pretend to be nice on the cover, like the witch and her candy house, or the gingerbread man who trusts the fox and then gets eaten.  They're good stories.  Probably he was supposed to learn important lessons about trusting things that seem nice at first, but are really out to kill you.  Instead they taught him that if he keeps the creepy diary more interesting things will happen.  Maybe he'll even get rescued from a wolf by a handsome huntsman.

 

\---

 

      _What hours?_   Harry asks after one of his many cauldron scrubbing detentions, because he's reasonable, and can see the potential benefits of running a time share on his body.  The diary neatly absorbs leftover soap water from the edge of his hand the same way it does the sparkling orange ink Harry has chosen for this particular conversation.  He's waited a few days to write back, so that Tom can think he's abandoned again.  That way Harry has the upper hand.  Like the godfather.  (Harry has never seen the godfather, but intimidation is important, he's sure of it.)

      _Explain yourself_   jots the diary, handwriting hasty, and Harry thinks that really what it means is "whAT."  Intimidation successful.

      _For how long each day. I've got classes, meals, homework, and self study. How much of that are you looking to cut in on?_

     It takes several minutes before the ink sinks upwards into words on the page again.

      _You can keep your classes, two meals, and self study. I'll take dinner, your homework, and two hours after."_

     Harry agrees with the stipulation that Tom the Diary doesn't mess up his GPA.

 

     Possession on a willing subject takes significantly less energy, and no one notices Harry's absence from the dorm for those couple of hours because he never showed up in the dorm before curfew anyway.

     Sometimes he comes out of a blackout washing blood off his hands or covered in grime, and admittedly it probably has to do with the weird voice hissing variations on "kill, rip, tear, kill" throughout the hallways.

     Harry ignores it in favor of framing his mostly complete chocolate frog card collection.  He is  _not_ going to be the axe swinging huntsman in this story.


End file.
